An Open Letter to All Chefs
An open letter to all Chefs
Not every chef behaves the same way — sadly, some act like bullies. Recent cooking shows and media have made abrasive behavior seem fashionable, but there is no valid excuse for treating staff poorly. A chef’s attitude has a direct impact on the kitchen: when leaders rely on intimidation, the learning environment collapses and anxiety replaces confidence.
Working under a chef who constantly yells at mistakes shuts down development. Anxiety and nervousness make it hard to absorb instruction or innovate. Instead of learning from errors, cooks become fearful of making them, which undermines both morale and performance. So why are some chefs supportive while others are abusive? A few explanations come to mind.
Insecurity: Some chefs who appear confident are actually insecure or unprepared for the responsibilities of running a kitchen. They may have been promoted for personality or presence rather than proven leadership. When they can’t manage operations, they often overwork a capable sous chef who quietly handles ordering, scheduling, training, and daily problem solving. The sous chef becomes the backbone of the operation — doing the real work while remaining underappreciated and overstressed. When sous chefs finally leave for workplaces that value their talents, the kitchen loses its most reliable leader and the whole team suffers.
Grandiosity: Other chefs display a harmful sense of superiority. These individuals may have achieved some success and then adopted a contemptuous, authoritarian style. They arrive moments before service, announce unrealistic specials, and demand flawless execution without providing time or support. Their disrespect can extend beyond the line to servers, hosts, and managers. Such behavior creates a toxic atmosphere where collaboration and respect are replaced by fear and resentment.
If you find yourself working for an abusive chef, your response depends on your circumstances. If you are bound by a culinary program or contractual obligation, you may have to endure it temporarily — focus on punctuality, complete your tasks reliably, and use the experience to sharpen your resilience. If you are not bound by contract, consider leaving. Time spent under a leader who stunts your growth could be better invested with a mentor who helps you develop your skills.
What to look for in a good chef:
Good chefs do exist, and they are usually excellent teachers. They willingly share techniques, clarify expectations, and invest time in their teams. A strong chef is confident but approachable: they set clear goals for interns and line cooks, observe progress, and provide constructive feedback privately rather than berating staff in public. These leaders celebrate their team’s successes and prepare others to step into leadership roles.
My earliest experiences in professional kitchens included some rough moments — burns, cuts, harsh criticism, and even food thrown in frustration. Yet those difficult times were far outweighed by the guidance and patience of the chefs who genuinely taught me. The mentors who helped me learn were willing to correct mistakes, explain techniques, and remain supportive even after serious errors (I once accidentally set a kitchen on fire — true story). They not only taught me how to cook, they became friends and ongoing sources of counsel.
If you want to become a chef, finding the right teacher is essential. The lessons and habits you pick up from your first mentor will shape your approach for years to come. Seek leaders who teach with patience, lead with respect, and invest in the growth of their team — those are the chefs worth following.